One of my hobbies is preparing ‘off the cuff’ responses to jargon-ridden (usually in business) bullshit. I already knew the “but there is ‘me’” response to the classic “there’s no ‘I’ in team”.
Now, thanks to writer Steven Poole, I know two more retorts – “but there are five in ‘individually brilliant’” and (as Poole puts is) a more forthright response “but there is a * in c*nt” (I’m saving the blushes of more delicate readers here)
I once worked with someone who, four years after leaving the Air Force (where I’m sure they go large on teamwork) had set up a successful social enterprise to meet a local need. He’d bypassed the local community and, when asked why he hadn’t involved other people – the politically-correct, textbook thing to do – he replied “If I had, a committee would still be trying to agree a name for the enterprise.”
Throughout my career, my instinct has been to go down the collaborative route – probably related to my pacifist Quaker upbringing that advocates consensus as the route to conflict resolution. I still believe we can ultimately do more together than alone but, in the past decade, I’ve concluded that life is too short and real needs too great to wait to get everyone on board. A more productive approach (albeit potentially less sustainable in the long run) is to ‘just do it’ and bring in others later – on the principle that people want to be associated with successful initiatives and they will follow the ‘early adopters’.
Where I think that teamwork is essential is in bringing companionship into the office environment – mutual support that’s particularly vital when involved in emotionally-draining occupations.
Which is why I despair that some short-sighted policy wonk from on high is wreaking havoc with the morale of health service professionals by suggesting they take their laptops and ‘go mobile’ by working in their cars and at home. While this is no doubt meant to save the NHS on office costs, the result is that workers are leaving the Health Service in droves; it’s making them ill.
To read the worst examples of office jargon http://www.hive.co.uk/Product/Steven-Poole/Who-Touched-Base-in-my-Thought-Shower–A-Treasury-of-Unbe/15772172